Why Do I Worry About Everything? Understanding Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

Most people worry from time to time. But sometimes worry starts to feel constant.

You might find that your mind moves from one concern to another — work, health, family, money, relationships or something that might happen in the future.

Even when one worry is resolved, another quickly takes its place.

A lot of people I work with say they know worrying is not helping, but still feel unable to switch it off.

When worry becomes difficult to control and starts affecting day-to-day life, it may be linked to Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD).

What does GAD feel like?

GAD is usually less about one specific fear and more about worrying across lots of different areas of life.

You might notice that you:

• Think ahead constantly about what could go wrong

• Find uncertainty particularly difficult

• Replay conversations or decisions

• Ask other people for reassurance

• Google things repeatedly to try to feel certain

• Over-prepare for situations

• Find it hard to make decisions in case you get them wrong

• Struggle to relax or switch off

• Lie awake thinking through possible problems

• Feel tense, restless or mentally exhausted

  
  

Sometimes people with GAD describe themselves as “overthinkers”.

Often, though, the thinking has a purpose: you are trying to make sure you have not missed anything, prevent something going wrong or feel certain that everything will be OK.

Why is worry so hard to stop?

One reason is that worry can feel useful.

You might think:

“If I think this through properly, I’ll be prepared.”

“If I worry about it now, I won’t be caught off guard.”

“I just need to know what’s going to happen.”

The problem is that worry rarely gives us complete certainty.

Instead, it can become a cycle.

Something uncertain happens.

You begin thinking about what might go wrong.

Anxiety increases.

You check, research, prepare, seek reassurance or keep thinking about it.

You feel better for a while.

Then another doubt appears.

Over time, your brain can start to learn that uncertainty is something dangerous that needs to be solved.

“But my worries are about real things”

This is something I hear a lot.

People with GAD are not necessarily worrying about things that are impossible.

Health problems can happen. Work can become stressful. Children can struggle. Relationships can change. Unexpected things happen in life.

CBT is not about pretending everything will always be fine.

Instead, it can help you recognise the difference between solving a problem and trying to solve uncertainty.

For example:

If you receive an unexpected bill, there may be something practical you can do — check the bill, contact the company and make a plan.

But worrying for hours about whether another unexpected bill might arrive in six months does not give you any new information.

It just keeps your brain focused on threat.

Reassurance can keep the cycle going

When you feel anxious, reassurance can be very tempting.

You might ask:

“Do you think it’ll be OK?”

“Are you sure I haven’t done something wrong?”

“You don’t think they’re annoyed with me, do you?”

The reassurance often works — but only temporarily.

Then another doubt comes along.

CBT can help you notice these patterns and gradually practise responding differently, so you do not need to feel completely certain before you can move on.

How can CBT help with GAD?

CBT looks at what is keeping your individual worry cycle going.

This might include:

• What tends to trigger your worries

• What you predict might happen

• How much reassurance you seek

• Whether you repeatedly check or research

• Whether you avoid uncertainty

• Whether you over-prepare

• What you believe worrying does for you

  
  

Therapy can then involve gradually testing some of these patterns.

For example, you might practise making a decision without repeatedly revisiting it, reduce reassurance seeking, leave some things unprepared or allow uncertainty to be there without trying to solve it immediately.

The aim is not to stop every worrying thought.

Everyone worries.

The aim is to help worry take up less of your time and to feel more able to cope when you do not know exactly what is going to happen.

What about children and teenagers?

Children and teenagers can experience excessive worry too.

Their worries may be about school, friendships, health, mistakes, family members or something bad happening.

Parents may notice lots of repeated questions such as:

“Are you sure?”

“What if something happens?”

“Will you definitely be there?”

Young people may also need a lot of preparation before unfamiliar situations or become very distressed when plans change.

CBT can help young people understand anxiety and build confidence in coping with uncertainty. Parents can also be involved where helpful, particularly if reassurance or avoidance has become part of the pattern.

When might it be worth getting help?

You do not need a formal diagnosis of GAD before seeking support.

It may be worth speaking to someone if worry is:

• Taking up a large part of your day

• Affecting your sleep

• Making decisions difficult

• Causing you to avoid things

• Affecting work, school or relationships

• Making it hard to enjoy the present

  
  

If some of this feels familiar, you can read more about my online CBT for Anxiety and GAD, including what sessions involve and how to arrange a free introductory call.

CBT is not about becoming certain that nothing bad will happen.

It is about becoming more confident that you can cope even when life feels uncertain.